The story of 3 H's - Horrendous, Horror Story and Hack Detailers...

[Mike Phillips]

The story of 3 H's - Horrendous, Horror Story and Hack Detailers...


Horrendous
Here's my definition of horrendous...






I don't know what word the rest of you use when you describe how horrible the rotary buffer swirls or holograms are in the paint that has been buffed incorrectly but I've always used the word... horrendous.

It just seems to fit not only the destruction and crime perpetrated to the car but the gut wrenching, sadness we all feel knowing the swirls didn't have to be inflicted into the paint...


Horror Story
I use the term "Horror Story" to describe the results a car experiences often time after being machine buffed, usually with a rotary buffer at either a body shop, a dealership and sometimes at a detail shop.


First... the rotary buffer is tool, it's neither good nor evil, it's how it's used or misused that determines the end results.

For a whole host of reasons, the buffing work usually done at the below types of business usually ends up instilling swirls into a car's paint.

• Body Shops - Usually shops that primarily focus on collision work, that is repairing daily driver covered by insurance after a wreck although some "Custom Body Shops" do hack work too.

• New and Used Car Dealerships

• Old School Detail Shops and/or Mobil Detailers

The detailers in charge of machine buffing inflict into the paint, circular scratches instilled by the misuse of a rotary buffer. Usually the root cause is a wool cutting or polishing pad and some type of abrasive compound or polish. The individual fibers that make up fiber-type buffing pads each have the ability to cut the paint, which we see as scratches, usually in some type of zig-zag pattern that mimics the pattern in which the buffer was moved over the paint.

After the swirls are inflicted, the paint is either glazed or waxed, or sealed, and the customer doesn't realize the damage that has been done till after the car is washed a few times and the previously applied products start to wash off revealing the swirls.

This is called a "Horror Story". Luckily discussion forums like this one exist and once the owner of such a vehicle comes to the realization that if the person that buffed their car couldn't do it right the first time they certainly won't be able to do it right the second time, these people then seek out help from others to educate and empower themselves to undo the damage themselves.


Hack Detailers
I don't personally like using this term or implying anyone is a "Hack Detailer", but the term is established in the Cyberworld of discussion forums and nothing I can do will change this fact.

That said, allow me to just point out a few observations I've made over the years...

First, what is a "Hack Detailer"?

A real Hack Detailer would be someone that knows they're doing shoddy work and does so anyways and the results from their work leave the paintwork looking horrendous.






Included in the definition of Hack Detailers are people that either knowingly or unknowingly instill rotary buffer swirls or holograms into a car's paint but do so either unwillingly or because they honestly know not what they do...

Unknowingly
The reason I state this can be done knowingly or unknowingly is because some products will look great after wipe-off after being applied using a rotary buffer, so in the detailer's mind he thinks he left a swirl free finish. It's after the paint is washed a few times or repeatedly exposed to inclement weather that whatever wax, sealant or glaze was applied begins to wash off exposing the rotary buffer swirls.

Now most of you reading this know that with a little education, the above group of people can be taught proper technique and things like choosing the appropriate pads and products to do good work, but not everyone is a member of a detailing discussion forum and a person only knows what they know. That's why I aways say that the best detailers are detailers that hang out on discussion forums because via discussion forums we're always learning about new products or new approaches...

Believe it or not, there exists people that buff out cars that don't hang out on the Internet let alone a detailing discussion forum.

Knowingly
At one point in my life I called on body shops, dealerships and detail shops to conduct product training, during another point in my life I called on these same types of shops to conduct sales and here's the deal... I met plenty of "detailers" and also "Painter's Helpers", that knew they were instilling swirls as a result of their buffing work but there was nothing they could do about it outside of quiting.

In these situations, these are employees provided products and tools by the company and their job is to do the best they can with what they are given. I know for a fact that many of these people knew they were doing hack work and didn't like it but the situation they were in was out of their control.

Sad truth is, most of have had jobs we didn't like but did them out of neccassity... If this hasn't happened to you... count your blessings...

The above are just two examples of people instilling swirls either knowingly or unknowingly and in these examples they don't really fit the description of "Hack Detailer" as it's usually used on discussion forums in a derogatory manner as their intentions were for good, their circumstances were out of their control.


A real Hack Detailer would be someone that knows they're doing shoddy work and does so anyways... I would say after you filter out everyone that fits into the above two categories, (knowingly or unknowingly), that there are fewer hack detailers in the world then we all think, that is people who knowingly and willingly do horrible work and create horrendous results.

As more and more detailers bring up the level of their skills and abilities, as well as the products, pads and tools they use, the more the work done by hack detailers stands out like a sore thumb.


The story of 3 H's - Horrendous, Horror Story and Hack Detailers...
This Mustang has horrendous finish, I don't know if it was buffed out by a Hack Detailer, or someone with good intentions but knowingly or unknowingly instilling swirls through the misuse of a rotary buffer. The end result however is yet another Horror Story.

[Quattro3.2]

Wow, is really all that can be said. Anyway, I would be very interested to se what you could do with a car like that. Did you/are you going to work your magic?

[Finemess]

Wow thats scary. Looks like an eyeball in the top center of the hood in pic #2.

[Impressions]

I could see the guy standing over the hood, whistling as he's doing loops around the washer squirters

[BobbyG]

It looks sorta purrdy don't it?

[Mirror Detailing]

New art trend? Kinda looks like the guy was going for one of those "Expressionist Paintings"

[canairb]

Mike, why do you always get the good ones to work on?

[Cliffnopus]

I thought the first couple of photo's were of a custom paint job with ghost artwork.

Cliff

[sullysdetailing]

Now I see what type of mustang your buffing out tonight

[Shane731]

I am knowingly a hack detailer. It will be awesome when I can quit washing cars at a dealership and get a real job. Just not much in the way of work around here. My only comfort is knowing that our cars don't get treated like that, thanks to AG and MOL.