Deep Gloss Auto Salon
08-13-2007, 10:02 AM
I found this particularly funny considering I finished my mid year performance appraisal a few weeks ago.
Thankfully non of these were on on my appraisal!!
1. Since my last report this employee has reached
rock bottom and has started to dig.
2. I would not allow this employee to breed.
3. This employee is really not much of a has-been,
but more of a definite won't be.
4. Works well when under constant supervision and
cornered like a rat in a trap.
5. When she opens her mouth, it seems it is only to
change feet.
6. He would be out of his depth in a parking lot
puddle.
7. This young lady has delusions of adequacy.
8. He sets low personal standards and then
consistently fails to achieve them.
9. This employee is depriving a village somewhere of
an idiot.
10. This employee should go far, and the sooner he
starts the better.
11. Got a full 6-pack, but lacks the plastic thing to
hold it all together.
12. A gross ignoramus --- 144 times worse than an
ordinary ignoramus.
13. He doesn't have ulcers, but he's a carrier.
14. He's been working with glue too much.
14. He would argue with a signpost.
15. He brings a lot of joy whenever he leaves the
room.
16. When his IQ reaches 50 he should sell.
17. If you see two people talking and one looks bored,
he's the other one.
18. A photographic memory but with the lens cover
glued on.
19. Donated his brain to science before he was done
using it.
20. Gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the
train isn't coming.
21. He's got two brains, one is lost and the other is
out looking for it.
22. If he were any more stupid, he'd have to be
watered twice a week.
23. If you gave him a penny for his thoughts, you'd
get change.
24. It's hard to believe he beat out 1,000,000 other
sperm.
25. One neuron short of a synapse.
26. Some drink from the fountain of knowledge, he only
gargled.
27. Takes him 2 hours to watch 60 minutes.
Thankfully non of these were on on my appraisal!!
1. Since my last report this employee has reached
rock bottom and has started to dig.
2. I would not allow this employee to breed.
3. This employee is really not much of a has-been,
but more of a definite won't be.
4. Works well when under constant supervision and
cornered like a rat in a trap.
5. When she opens her mouth, it seems it is only to
change feet.
6. He would be out of his depth in a parking lot
puddle.
7. This young lady has delusions of adequacy.
8. He sets low personal standards and then
consistently fails to achieve them.
9. This employee is depriving a village somewhere of
an idiot.
10. This employee should go far, and the sooner he
starts the better.
11. Got a full 6-pack, but lacks the plastic thing to
hold it all together.
12. A gross ignoramus --- 144 times worse than an
ordinary ignoramus.
13. He doesn't have ulcers, but he's a carrier.
14. He's been working with glue too much.
14. He would argue with a signpost.
15. He brings a lot of joy whenever he leaves the
room.
16. When his IQ reaches 50 he should sell.
17. If you see two people talking and one looks bored,
he's the other one.
18. A photographic memory but with the lens cover
glued on.
19. Donated his brain to science before he was done
using it.
20. Gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the
train isn't coming.
21. He's got two brains, one is lost and the other is
out looking for it.
22. If he were any more stupid, he'd have to be
watered twice a week.
23. If you gave him a penny for his thoughts, you'd
get change.
24. It's hard to believe he beat out 1,000,000 other
sperm.
25. One neuron short of a synapse.
26. Some drink from the fountain of knowledge, he only
gargled.
27. Takes him 2 hours to watch 60 minutes.