We now offer tinting

[sullysdetailing]

Okay this is what I have writen up so far. How does it sound? How can I camit better?
Sully’s Detailing now offers window tinting. Derek Patageorge is out tinter. He tinted for Vista BMW have done over 6k cars there alone, and now he is the tinter for Sully’s Detailing. He has a shop a few miles away (next door to Billet Design), or he can come to your house.

We use LLumar Film, because they put the best product out. At Sully’s Detailing we only use the best detailing products and we expect the same quality for tinting that is why we use LLumas Film. LLumar make some the most expensive films.

Some Shops around town use cheaper film and tell you it's just as good or better, it might even save you a few dollars. Do not fall into their trap. Films like Suntek and Solar Guard will bubble and fade over time. If you want to get a perfect tint job with the best film made, look no further then Sully’s Detailing.

Derek can also make frame less doors look like it was tinted from the factory. With NO MIRO EDGE AT ALL! He rolls the film over the edge of the window and heat it. He will do this for no extra charge. Shops that know how to do this charge an extra $20 per window. 99% of tinters out there don't even know how to do this!

LLumar came out with a new product. Called Air Blue 80. It is a thick film with some new patented technology. It is pretty much clear. It block's the same UV and rejects the same heat, as LLumar ATR 15. A lot of people are getting this put on their front windshields. They did this because they did not want to get a ticket for have the front windshield tinted but want to block heat. Cops can't see it! If you do not like the look of tinted windows but want to keep the heat out this is a product for you.

If you need a tint examination forms we have those too, just get it signed by your doctor and you will never get another tint ticket again

[sullysdetailing]

Anyone

[LincolnZephyr2006]

Looks good. There is quite a few grammar and spelling errors to correct, though. I used to put llumar on my vehicles in the past, but now use Solar Guard. Although, the Air Blue sounds interesting. I may have to put that on the Lincoln someday....

[David Fermani]

I take it because you're an "Auto Geek Product Tester" you're allowed to freely advertise your business like this?

[sullysdetailing]

Im not advertising I'm asking for help on how to word it.

[David Fermani]

"We now offer tinting " isn't advertising?

[Shade Tree]

I think I would go this way instead .............

Sully's Detailing is proud to announce the addition of glass tinting to our list of available services.

We have teamed up with Derek Patageorge to offer our customers a high quality & experienced installer. For the past (insert number of years here) Derek has been a fixture with Vista BMW having installed on more than 6K vehicles during that time. Derek's work, expertise and fine attention to detail are what makes his ability a step above the rest and why we are proud to have teamed up with him.

We are also proud to offer one of the most advanced & highly regarded window tint films on the market today, Llumar film. Llumar film is constantly bringing new & innovative films to their already highly regarded product line and has recently introduced Air Blue 80 as it's newest window film product.

Air Blue 80 is nearly impossible to see after Derek has installed it. It's THAT clear. The Air Blue 80 film is a clear film that no longer uses the "dark tint" technology. The windows remain clear without the dark look that will often grab the unwanted attention of the police.
Clear = no tickets. Could the decision be any easier to make?

Stop in today for your free quote and ask to speak with Derek.

- Sully's Auto Detailing





Ok, so I just skimmed over what you had written and reworked it quite a bit. You have a lot of information that you don't need to have in the original. The mentioning of the "doctor's note" deal will most certainly bring you trouble in the form of a business license being revoked. Offer something like that to someone who is on the fence with the price of tinting or wants darker tint.

Keep it short, simple and to the point.

[Peanut]

Originally Posted by Shade Tree

I think I would go this way instead .............

Sully's Detailing is proud to announce the addition of glass tinting to our list of available services.

We have teamed up with Derek Patageorge to offer our customers a high quality & experienced installer. For the past (insert number of years here) Derek has been a fixture with Vista BMW having installed on more than 6K vehicles during that time. Derek's work, expertise and fine attention to detail are what makes his ability a step above the rest and why we are proud to have teamed up with him.

We are also proud to offer one of the most advanced & highly regarded window tint films on the market today, Llumar film. Llumar film is constantly bringing new & innovative films to their already highly regarded product line and has recently introduced Air Blue 80 as it's newest window film product.

Air Blue 80 is nearly impossible to see after Derek has installed it. It's THAT clear. The Air Blue 80 film is a clear film that no longer uses the "dark tint" technology. The windows remain clear without the dark look that will often grab the unwanted attention of the police.
Clear = no tickets. Could the decision be any easier to make?

Stop in today for your free quote and ask to speak with Derek.

- Sully's Auto Detailing





Ok, so I just skimmed over what you had written and reworked it quite a bit. You have a lot of information that you don't need to have in the original. The mentioning of the "doctor's note" deal will most certainly bring you trouble in the form of a business license being revoked. Offer something like that to someone who is on the fence with the price of tinting or wants darker tint.

Keep it short, simple and to the point.

with Shade Tree.

[sullysdetailing]

Thanks guys

[sparkie]

Originally Posted by Shade Tree

I think I would go this way instead .............

Sully's Detailing is proud to announce the addition of glass tinting to our list of available services.

We have teamed up with Derek Patageorge to offer our customers a high quality & experienced installer. For the past (insert number of years here) Derek has been a fixture with Vista BMW having installed on more than 6K vehicles during that time. Derek's work, expertise and fine attention to detail are what makes his ability a step above the rest and why we are proud to have teamed up with him.

We are also proud to offer one of the most advanced & highly regarded window tint films on the market today, Llumar film. Llumar film is constantly bringing new & innovative films to their already highly regarded product line and has recently introduced Air Blue 80 as it's newest window film product.

Air Blue 80 is nearly impossible to see after Derek has installed it. It's THAT clear. The Air Blue 80 film is a clear film that no longer uses the "dark tint" technology. The windows remain clear without the dark look that will often grab the unwanted attention of the police.
Clear = no tickets. Could the decision be any easier to make?

Stop in today for your free quote and ask to speak with Derek.

- Sully's Auto Detailing





Ok, so I just skimmed over what you had written and reworked it quite a bit. You have a lot of information that you don't need to have in the original. The mentioning of the "doctor's note" deal will most certainly bring you trouble in the form of a business license being revoked. Offer something like that to someone who is on the fence with the price of tinting or wants darker tint.

Keep it short, simple and to the point.

You sold me on it....